Affirmations

Affirmations for today…

I allow myself ample leisure time without feeling guilty.

I trust my ability to say No.

Safety is an inside job.

I let go of needing to perform and produce and just “be”.

I allow myself to have fun for funs sake

The world is not a cruel place

I have enough, I do enough I AM enough….

All is well.

Affirmations

Affirmations for today…

I create wonderful opportunities for myself

My life is full of joy and abundance

I forgive myself for accepting sex when I wanted love

I am a precious child of God and loved exactly as I am

I say No to what I don’t want and Yes to what I do – the choice is mine

I have everything I need for today

I forgive others who have hurt me…

Reflections

It’s in our DNA…Ancestral Trauma.

In todays post I wanted to write about my take and lived experience on the idea of Ancestral or carried trauma.

It’s no mystery that we are a culmination of our parents DNA and with that comes a deeper, engrained network of scripts (from the world of transactional analysis) and learnt behaviours and responses.

Also, fascinating to me is the notion and evidence based work on ancestral trauma and mental / emotional health within our families of origin.

Many studies have been conducted in this area and if someone is challenged by their own mental / emotional health today, when traced back it is often seen that there is a blueprint of poor mental health in other family members backgrounds and lived experience.

Is is also fantastic to see emerging more body centric therapies and modalities that take this viewpoint seriously and work to unlock repressed trauma and release trapped “emotion” In this way.

In my own experience and when working with clients and students I have been witness to some amazing shifts and emotional releases on the level of deeper body awareness, sensations and consciousness.

Some of the theories , therapies and approaches that I have seen work are

Reiki

EMDR

Somatic Experiencing

Gestalt coaching

Pyschedelic intervention (with additional therapy)

Yoga

Meditation

Chanting

Tantric practices

All of these in my opinion go beyond the talk based approaches that other modalities offer.

I do understand and have also personally experienced deep rooted trauma being healed on an equally deep level not by “talking” about the problem but by feeling the problem, getting in touch with the emotion, understanding what wisdom the body is giving me, what the learning is and “then” being safe enough to release it while has had a marked positive impact on emotional resilience and on wide spread body pain and fatigue.

Conditions like chronic fatigue syndrome and fibromyalgia to name just two.

Its not a miracle cure and takes commitment but it is also a beautifully profound approach to listen to our bodies own healing “response” and very importantly to pay close attention to the answers that arise from this level of work.

It may be In our DNA but it doesn’t mean it is yours to carry.

It can be released with help and support.

I would not undertake this level of work without consulting a trained and competent facilitator in body based therapies and approaches..

May you find your healing spaces and places where you are held and safe..

With love from.

Paul.

Tips and Tools

10 tips to let go…

Today I wanted to share my ideas on letting go.

I know that when I am faced with the unexplored, unknown and un chartered this can cause fear.

Even if my fear is unfounded. My body can still “react” to these fear responses.

Also with the complex nature of trauma these intense emotions can become “trapped” in the body energetically.

Hence I believe a lot of chronic pain conditions are trauma based and have emotional elements to them which I will cover in another blog post.

So how do we let go of this ,how can we release the trauma? How can we let go of the intensity?

I’ve shared some tips below:

  1. Yoga… This is especially helpful to get back into the body and out of the head- think gentle stretches rather than yogic gymnastics
  2. Prayer… To hand it over to a power greater than myself whether that be on my knees or writing a letter to God / Spirit /Angels to help me and remove my fear and putting the letter in my God Box
  3. Meditation…Especially body scans that focus on each muscle group in turn to create the relaxation response within our bodies
  4. Nature….get out of your head!, go for a walk, soak in the healing gift that mother nature has given us, trees, greenery, beautiful landscapes waiting to be explored
  5. Distraction …Something that can focus your attention and be enjoyed. I love to knit and do Mandala coloring books
  6. Creative writing….This has greatly helped me process my feelings in different ways whether that be short stories or poetry
  7. Arts and crafts. My inner child loves to play, making soaps, making cards and pottery
  8. Hot bubbly baths, with epsom salts and candles…lush escapes
  9. Listen to classical music, especially music without words
  10. Invest in good therapy!

These are just some ideas that have and do really help me.

Good luck with your own solutions and healing adventures.

Feel free to share what works for you too….

Reflections

Giving yourself a chance…

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I wanted to write today about the importance of self healing and the time this can take.

I have witnessed and also personally experienced the throws of dealing with trauma.

Through the lens of CPTSD.

This was a long and arduous journey through very dark times, shadowy places and uncharted waters.

Thankfully I didn’t do it alone. I invested in recovery by choosing a fully qualified EMDR specialist who bit by bit was able to support me in my healing journey as well as the amazing friendships I have and an emerging spiritual practice which is at the heart and core of  my healing.

This has taken time and much needed pooling of my own internal resources to assist me.

The most important aspect has been allowing and giving myself as much time as I need to heal.

Sometimes this can take 5 steps forward and 4 steps back. It has been imperative that I dont push myself too hard or too fast.

I also see that people with or who have experienced trauma can also have performance or perfection scripts going on . The ones that say be more, do more and hurry up.

The most important work I see away from social norms of achievement is to do the inner work, the piecing together of broken childhoods, family dysfunction and learnt and addictive coping strategies.

To replace them gradually with self comfort in healthier ways, creative outlets and love.

Also not to be ashamed of asking for help. To risk being seen and vulnerable and above all to stop picking on ourselves and give ourselves a break.

I sometimes say “if God existed and he was sitting with me would he be asking me to “hurry up”?

No he would want me to rest, be still and be at peace…

I trust that today.

Blessings

 

Paul.